December 6, 2011 at 12:13 pm #256203
Well I don’t know why I am telling you all this but just feel I need to document it a bit as it’s all getting a bit scary so need to share.
Hubby finished up work last Friday and his leave runs out at the end of january. One of the main reasons for being a bit hesitant about leaving was cos I was looking after my darling mum and could not see myself leaving her on her own. After a sudden, acute illness we lost her at the beginning of this month and now that most of the emptying of her home and going through her/my memories and all the paperwork is completed there is nothing to keep us here any longer. I feel shattered, lost and a bit confused.
We really do want to start a new life as espedially now that Mum is gone i need a focus in my life- I cannot see myself sitting here struggling in the heat and against the bugs, water costs to try to pursue a more self sufficient lifestyle. Our kids are all grown up and starting new lives and i’m sure they don’t want us looking to organize them- if you konw what i mean.
Anyway, we got an agent out yesterday to give us anidea of wht we could expect in the way of rent/sale of this house and today one is visiting our investment property on Russel Island for the same reason. Our youngest son has just got into the course he wanted so has decided he doesn’t want to come with us now so we are thinking that he may whant to stay in this house and share with either some mates or his sister and her partner- it would give them all a bit of security and an opportunity to save a bit of money as we would only need the rent to cover a new mortgage in Tassie.Also it would enable us to buy in today’s (slow ) market and sell up here in a few years when hopefully things have picked up a bit.
So theoretically we would be in a position to start looking when we are down there in January and to possibly buy something( if the bank was in the right mood of course.) We always just wanted to be debt free and the thought of taking out yet another mortgage isn’t appealing but in the end it would probably be the best thing for all concerned.
So that’s where we’re at ATM. thanks all for being there! 🙂 Just needed to write it down to put it out there to help me get it it all into my head.December 6, 2011 at 12:24 pm #515826BlueWrenMember
Hi Sue First of all , lots of love in the loss of your dear Mum.It must have been a difficult time for you finalising everything.And second all the best for working out the future and everything that will be involved in that, your current house, kids etc.Please keep us posted if you want to.The years “after kids” can be very special in their own way. :hug: :hug: :kiss:December 6, 2011 at 12:40 pm #515827mauziMember
Hi Sue. Having lost my dad just one year ago now, it took me at least six months to start to think and respond with real clarity and I would say it is only now that I have felt myself again. Don’t expect too much of yourself too soon. :hug: It takes time. I was surprised how long it did take me and on top of that you have a different phase in your life – without the kids – and coming to a new place. There is a lot on your plate.
I also have just gone through the boys leaving home thing and I do miss them but as BlueWren says, life post kids does have many merits as well, but nevertheless it is an adjustment.
Be kind to yourself, and I for one, am looking forward to catching up with you in January.December 6, 2011 at 1:13 pm #515828weaverMember
No wonder you are feeling all at sea. So much change in such a short time and grieving for the loss of your mum at the same time :hug: .
Take things slowly and explore while you are in Tassie. The next phase of your life will be wonderful, it is just the interim that is troubling. Change is difficult but I think you have wanted this move for so long and your reasons are all very sound. It will work :tup:December 7, 2011 at 1:45 am #515829bluezbanditMember
Tassie will do you the world of good as you adapt to a new way of life, relaxed and refreshed. Hopefully you will find exactly what you are looking for, for just the right price.
DebDecember 7, 2011 at 1:56 am #515830BobbeeMember
My sincere condolences on the passing of your mum Sue. :hug: :hug: Try to give yourself some space, like Mauzi said, it takes time to recover from such a loss. :hug: :hug:
Travelling around Tassie sounds like ‘just what the doctor ordered’ to me. Enjoy the laid back lifestyle and hopefully you will find the property of your dreams, for the next stage of your life. :hug: :hug:
Love and Light,
Bobbs :hug: :hug: :hug:December 7, 2011 at 11:36 am #515831
Thank you all so much for your kind words. I really appreciate it. I was just feeling a bit overwhelmed yesterday and it is hard to vent with family because they are grieving too and it doesn’t seem fair to wreck one of their good days with one of my bad days. I know all this will get better as time goes on and I guess that kind of wisdom comes as we get older. We really see our trip as a light at the end of the tunnel and then the move as the ultimate adventure. Any doubts we had are gone as losing Mum so suddenly has made us realize that time waits for no one and we need to grab life and enjoy any postives that come our way. I really do appreciate the people on this site-you restore my faith in humanity. SueDecember 7, 2011 at 12:27 pm #515832BlueWrenMember
:hug: :kiss:December 7, 2011 at 12:39 pm #515833karyn26Member
:hug: :hug: :hug:
I agree with everyone else,be kind to yourself.
There is life after the kids,you just live differently.
Hope you find your bit of paradise in Tassie.December 9, 2011 at 2:00 am #515834philburtMember
My condolences on the loss of your mum. We lost my Mum in July and as the English legal system moves at a glacial pace we are still dealing with it. Christmas will be hard as her birthday was Christmas Eve. The move to Tassie is still only a dream for us as our kids are still at school and uni. Good luck in your new life.December 9, 2011 at 12:37 pm #515835
condolences to you too Philburt.Christmas will be hard, that’s for sure but especially for you.Everyone tells me the first of everything is hard- the first Christmas, the first birthday etc. but then it will get better.Hope this proves true for both of us. SueDecember 9, 2011 at 11:05 pm #515836GiannaMember
I’m so sorry for your loss Sue. :kiss: :hug:December 10, 2011 at 12:55 am #515837philburtMember
Thank you Sue, we will try to celebrate a life well lived, not a loved one lost.December 26, 2011 at 11:03 am #515838
All our garden beds are gone- now under grass in readiness to put the place on the market.Found a home for our chooks and ducks and the chook tractors yesterday. all my pot plants are going to new homes(including the famous Blueberry) Have made numerous trips to lifeline disposing of stuff that we won’t take with us.
Got a knot the size of Qld in my stomach but pushing on.
We leave on the 12th for our journey south.We will be down in Tassie on the 16th and hopefully will find a place while we are there.
SCARY!!!! 🙂 🙁 :shrug:December 26, 2011 at 2:04 pm #515839bluezbanditMember
Here is hoping all goes well for you. It’s a big move but one you won’t regret, (I believe)
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