Aussies Living Simply

Don't Tell Me..

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    Don’t Tell Me

    Please don’t tell me you know how I feel,

    Unless you have lost your child too.

    Please don’t tell me my broken heart will heal,

    Because that is just not true.

    Please don’t tell me my son is in a better place,

    Though it is true, I want him here with me.

    Don’t tell me someday I’ll hear his voice, see his face,

    Beyond today I cannot see.

    Don’t tell me it is time to move on,

    Because I cannot.

    Don’t tell me to face the fact he is gone,

    Because denial is something I can’t stop.

    Don’t tell me to be thankful for the time I had,

    Because I wanted more.

    Don’t tell me when I am my old self you will be glad,

    I’ll never be as I was before.

    What you can tell me is you will be here for me,

    That you will listen when I talk of my child.

    You can share with me my precious memories,

    You can even cry with me for a while.

    And please don’t hesitate to say his name,

    Because it is something I long to hear everyday.

    Friend please realize that I can never be the same.

    But if you stand by me, you may like the new person I become someday.

    Judi Walker

    (In Memory of Shane)

    Well, it’s time to stop being an immature idiot loser and waiting for them to tell me it was all a terrible mistake and that really Michael was just missing.

    Gone camping or riding his motorbike or took that mining job he wanted.

    I got the death certificate today. I can’t open the envelope. It says to open it with a friend or family member…or your bloody Doctor!

    What do I do once I’ve opened it? And where does a mother file such a thing??


    And where does a mother file such a thing?? in her heart with all the other memories








    I can’t imagine what it must be like Tulls, I wish I could take some of your pain away. I do imagine it is something a mother can never get over, although I hope one day, in the distant future, it will hurt a little less.

    Love you loads Tully :hug: x 1000


    Tullymoor wrote:

    Well, it’s time to stop being an immature idiot loser and waiting for them to tell me it was all a terrible mistake and that really Michael was just missing.

    Tully don’t be so hard on yourself – sounds to me like a perfectly normal reaction to not want to believe something this awful is true.



    We are here Tully talk away .:kiss::kiss::kiss: As a mum my heart is breaking for you,Wil give my 18yr old thug an extra hug and kiss when he gets home tonight .


    oh Tully, I have no words, just love and caring. Please don’t be too hard on yourself.



    πŸ™ very true words… When I was a little girl and lost my father I spent the next 20 or so years thinking that one day he would come back and that they had made a mistake…such is the depth of grief.

    Tully, open the letter when you feel you can, even if it is days, months, years….put it some-where safe and do it in your own time.




    You keep them forever in your heart and you cry for them inside everyday. I lost my son aged 20 nine years ago and when I read your poem it was like it was yesterday.

    I have a ‘Joshua box’ that is just for me – I do keep his death certificate and his autopsy report and it is painful to look at and read, but I also keep cards he made me and a lock of his hair and other precious memories of what made up his life.

    You never get over it and you are never the same but it does get a little easier with time.

    I send you the biggest hug I can conujure up



    As a mother who has also lost a son, my heart goes out to you Tully.


    It’s true. You will never be as you were before.


    Topend Tam


    People think that once the funeral is over they don’t need to support you much more. The truth is, at that point it hasn’t even sunk in yet, and it’s normal for you to only start feel like it’s sinking in months later. Kids aren’t supposed to go before their parents, yet for some reason the world just keeps on going on when your whole world has been devastated.

    I lost my 2yo son 14 years ago, and I still have the odd moment of stark realisation that he is actually dead. I still have dreams sometimes that he is alive, or that he has come back from the dead. I dreamt just last night that I finally found him hiding somewhere.

    One thing I encouraged my kids and partner to realise is that just because he isn’t with us, that doesn’t mean he isn’t still part of our family – I still have 3 boys, and my boys still have 2 brothers.

    Just as you will always have a son, and be a mother.

    Tully, if you PM me your address, I’ve got a book for bereaved parents that I’d like to send you. (No hard feelings if you’re not feeling up to it though…)



    you’re in my thoughts Tully :hug:


    I can’t believe how many of you have lost children. :hug: to you all.


    I am a mother of a very little girl and I’m crying thinking what you women are going through with the loss of your children. It is one of my greatest fears that I will lose her somehow, infact those things go through my mind everyday, so I can’t even begin to think what you must deal with. I just want to send my love and support. :kiss::kiss::hug::hug:



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