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Advice From A Domestic Goddess, part 9, Avoiding a collaption!

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Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 26 total)
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  • #257102
    porgey
    Member

    Due to a rather sudden onset of stress nothing politely expressed with the written word went through my head. Even after a long walk I could not find enough words to adequately explain the mental images that began to fill my head as I took the pooch for a stroll along the beach. Dont get me wrong I do enjoy Queenies parents over a quiet dinner and was surprised at the level of civility when circumstances meant that we all remained housebound for a long weekend but any longer and I am reaching for the Epipen.

    I thought anaphylaxis was caused mainly by peanut allergy, well medical world stick this “little” gem in your MIMS as an instant ball roller that creates the cascade of symptoms that ultimately leads to death;

    -In 12 months time Queenie has long service leave and her arthritic Mum want us to join them on a 6 month cruise. Yep the four of us cooped up in a sailing boat somewhere between the safe sandy shores of my beloved Blairgowrie and the marine nightmare that a passage to Fiji and beyond will most certainly become.

    Split Enz famously sang “Six Months In A Leaky Boat” but the thought of six months with a creaky goat has got me in a state way beyond the tight chest and shortness of breath that idealistic family gatherings usually plunge me into, and in record time I might add.

    Still struggling with how to explain the mental images of our high seas adventure if you copy & google the following pearl of a video you may get a clue!;

    The Best Of Newman(S3-S9) – You Tube

    #525267
    karyn26
    Member

    Apparently ships are rather large sea faring craft and one can get lost amongst its portals quite easily,so I’m led to believe.

    either that or jump overboard if you need to.

    I wouldnt be caught walking up the gangplank of any ship as the sea sickness does affect me badly,regardless of size of said craft.

    Porgy yet another corner turned in your life of torment,lol.

    I’m quite surprised a No9 is upon us already when No8 is still broiling.Och is said Queenie ready to dispatch you at sea laddy!!!! with the help of the outlaws arthritic or no.

    I will stay tuned for further reports…………………

    #525268
    dierich
    Participant

    oooohhh, i’m looking forward to the rest of this story :ohmy:

    #525269
    bluezbandit
    Member

    I can see that Queenie has got together with the old bird and cooked this up as revenge for all you have seemingly done to her.

    Goodluck and bon voyage!

    #525270
    BlueWren
    Member

    Porgey ……thank God you have a beach and a pooch!!! :tup: That’s a tricky situation for sure!!Who’s paying for it? Although that is definitely none of our business , but if it’s you could you strike an either/or deal over the interior designer or the cruise?

    PS We love you! :hug: :hug: and you can lose yourself on a ship – doing laps ,around the deck or in the pool, for starters.

    #525271
    Steve
    Keymaster

    We won’t mention what bunking with the in-laws does to your sex life either….. Bugger!

    But Porgey, I’m sure you exaggerate! I’m sure Queenie brings stability and balance to your life…

    #525272
    Bobbee
    Member

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    #525273
    BlueWren
    Member

    Oh I missed that bit Steve! Are they all going to be in the same cabin?? :jawdrop: As for sex on a ship it’s either very very good or very very bad!!!! There are many variables!! :laugh: :laugh: And I am One who Knows.!

    #525274
    Steve
    Keymaster

    I dunno BW. I was making a few assumptions. Afterall the truth should never get in the way of a good story… 😀 :laugh:

    Ummm, I should never have mentioned sex should I? Way out of my depth straight away. I have no idea about sex on a ship…. :blush: :blush: :blush:

    #525275
    calliecat
    Participant

    BlueWren post=345553 wrote: Oh I missed that bit Steve! Are they all going to be in the same cabin?? :jawdrop: As for sex on a ship it’s either very very good or very very bad!!!! There are many variables!! :laugh: :laugh: And I am One who Knows.!

    :blink: :whistle: :laugh: :laugh:

    #525276
    Bobbee
    Member

    Ahem!!!!!cough…cough….. :ohmy:

    How dare you folk have fun when I am not ‘onboard’ so to speak. :laugh:

    Hey there One Who Knows, sounds like there may be a few stories that could be told, but being as how you are a ‘Liedy’ I expect you will just leave us to ponder. 😛 :blush:

    :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:

    :hug:

    #525277
    BlueWren
    Member

    No you shouldn’t have mentioned sex Steve, it’s all your fault again for starting the downward spiral……….. :laugh: :shrug:

    Yes Bobbee, I will leave you to ponder,but I can assure you that when pregnant and very sea sick don’t even think about it!! :sick: :sick:

    But…..our own little half cabin boat amongst pristine tropical islands far far away from the madding crowd is a different story altogether …….but that’s not a ship is it?

    #525278
    Bobbee
    Member

    🙂 :hug: :kiss:

    :clap: :woohoo: :woohoo:

    :hug:

    #525279
    Gumnut
    Member

    I’m sorry I have to share this even though it’s very naughty! But you guys started this 👿

    Today I was talking to some girlfriends at work and we ended up discussing belly buttons, I was complaining that I had an “inny” and they were annoying because you had to use a cotton bud or cloth corner to clean them properly. My girlfriend then advised me very seriously “Don’t you know you shouldn’t put anything smaller than your elbow in any orifice of your body”. I just looked at her and said “You have three kids, that’s very impressive” :laugh: :laugh:

    I’m sorry it’s very naughty but I had to share.

    #525280
    BlueWren
    Member

    Oh dear …….what HAVE we done to porgey’s thread? The poor fellow’s gone completely quiet…….sorry porgey. 🙁 Blame Steve ……this Liedy would never have mentioned sex!

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